I have an issue with a recent CNN story I
read about the parents of a first grader filing a complaint (I don't think it's
a lawsuit yet) against a school district alleging gender discrimination.
The
article talks about a child who was born with male body parts, but as a toddler
started identifying as a female. The parents decided they wanted the child to
be happy so they let the child continue to identify as a female. The picture of
the child with the article shows what appears to be a little girl with purple
hair and wearing a dress. The complaint is based on the fact that the
child was previously able to do everything in school as a girl, but recently
the parents were told that the child can no longer use the girls restroom. Quote
from the parents, "We were very confused because everything was going so
well, and they had been so accepting, and all of a sudden it changed and it was
very confusing and very upsetting because we knew that, by doing that, she was
going to go back to being unhappy"
I have many thoughts/opinions/possibly judgments (I have to
tell you the truth) about this situation - mostly about the parents. First of
all, I would not be comfortable with my first grade daughter walking
in the girls restroom and accidentally seeing the private parts
of a boy. I believe this is a big part of the issue the school is probably
dealing with. It's one thing if you have siblings of the opposite sex and you
happen to see them naked - it's another thing when it comes to strangers -
whether you're a child or an adult. I actually went back and watched the
video and felt kind of bad for the parents (because my initial question
was if part of the problem was them over-indulging their child - but again, I
was being judgmental), but I especially felt bad for the child who was there
and had to hear all of this! If your child was depressed at the age of three,
wouldn't it make sense to shelter them from situations where they may feel as
though an entire school district hates them? Why should this child (and
apparently the couple's other kids) be there during the press conference?
Reporters always ask crazy questions. This is just exposure to another
emotional roller-coaster.
The last thing I'm going to say
about the whole issue is this: I was born black. If I had decided when I was a
toddler that I was white, should I have been able to be treated as a white
person the rest of my life? Come on, we all know the truth, yes, everyone is
supposed to be treated equally, regardless of race, but everyone is not treated
equally. I can make a phone call right now to anyone in corporate America and
they will have no idea that I am black, but the moment I meet them in person, I
will see the flash of surprise/shock cross their face. My point is, being black
is a biological fact for me. I can't do any manner of bleaching my skin,
straightening my hair, or changing my accent, that will make me white, Asian,
or anything else - someone (actually, most people) will see me for who I am.
What if my parents had decided to let me identify as a white person? Would I
have a better life now? Heck No! I would be all the way confused and jacked up!
My life would be absolutely miserable because I would never understand why
everybody else does not see me the way I want them to see me.
I realize these issues are slightly
different, but are they really? I'm confused and frustrated. Guess what? This
world isn't fair and no matter what we do, it never will be. This is earth, not
heaven. Every person in this world looks at someone, or something and wishes
their life could be different in some
way, but it doesn't work like that.
Please share your opinions with me
because I am struggling with my feelings about this issue. I don't want to be
"unloving" or hateful, but I truly would like to understand this
better.
